Mommy Wars

Wartime again in this family
And I get to be the chosen one
To take on the burden of others’ pain
To be left in the dark alone and lonely

Only my family to keep me sane
My family, not the one that raised me
Not the parents that conceived me
Or the mother who birthed me

Changing dynamics takes effort, compliance
But you want it how it used to be
When I was a girl, a willing protector
When I was your best friend, anxiously waiting

For you to come home from long trips across states
And leave for me a piece of your attention
I understand, I even forgave you
For all of the times you left me to flounder

Divorce #1, made me wonder
What I possibly could have done
To deserve your frustration in such a manner
Ignoring my gut-wrenching cries

You said you were sorry,
The damage was done
I distanced myself to stay protected
No longer consenting to disappointment

You built me back up, I believed again
That we could grow into something better
But, now I see clearly inside this web
The only release is to use scissors

Or a vacuum, a broom, whatever it takes
To free myself permanently
I won’t be the daughter you want me to be

Stop looking for a mirage that isn’t there

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