I am diving too much into news, buzzes and feeds, brutally aware of their intended distraction. I feel I am walking through mud as I attempt to make tiny steps toward productivity. When I do take a pause, without this device that threatens to bend my thumbs into a permanent texting state, I feel the overwhelming emotions of suppressed things, bubbling to the surface and bringing guilt, longing, fear, confusion and grit.

I endure this flood for mere minutes compared to the hours I spend otherwise, where all the thoughts are still there, informing reactions and stress responses.

Luckily, I have something to look forward to. A drive to the ocean, art and a breeze, the sound of waves, seagulls, a seascape to take in.

If only I felt the priority of giving myself the gift each day, to not distract, but to take in nature and allow the calm, instead of locking myself in a personal vault where isolation is voluntary.

Emily C. Poesie © 2019

Photo Credit: Bessi Pixabay

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