Upped my dose now when I feel it’s like an avalanche building slowly with time precipitation, density one fated sound or movement the unwelcome trigger revealing what’s buried underneath my belly aches eyes burn with the manifestations of all past regrets losses, tragedies mingled with remembrance of when I was strong enough to be consistent…
Category: Anxiety
Known
Lost in the moment heart beating rapidly air failing to reach constricted lungs I feel each breath, the sounds of struggling unsure of what I’m suffering from I drive intensely- need my home to hide away from bright sunlight home is where I know the rules and break them when and how I like I…
Not likely
For the first time in months,I allow myself to feel the creeping hopelessness of my current state Anger and grief for myself while not being able to fully move Quicksand steps in life and dreams, unable to do what must be done to climb out of the well I’ve put myself in I’ve allowed myself…
Justify
Opening her oldest wounds feelings of uncertainty always looming seeking confirmation of another leaving so she doesn’t have to take the blame; regardless of her deflecting underneath the pain and anxious worry she knows she is the the one that leaves justified by leavers that made her bleed. Emily C. Poésie © 2019
War
When will I believe he loves me? After each test is passed and new ones created to double check? When will I believe I love me? After doubt is a distant memory and the urge to self-harm is repressed? My war displayed in two living beings. Mirrored, dueling flames. Emily C. Poésie © 2019 Image:…
Bored
I may be dramatic, but I know men, I’ve seen each mask, revealed hidden secrets through pure intuition, attuned to the constant possibility that I am not loved or wanted for all pieces of me, just the part that provides intrigue and passion for bored hearts. Emily C. Poésie © 2018
Within
pen to paper, thoughts are swirling, would be whirlpools to the depths lifejacket useless in this wind, the current pulls, attempts to swim my body wishes sweet surrender, take me now or leave forever, I cannot feel the pain of thoughts, true or false, it matters not I wish I could feel others’ love, but…
Dream
Restless sleep, bone dry, a stranger in my bed, nightmarish gloom, voices mumble words I no longer understand; Lack of fear, when temperance is vital, my teeth fall out, a void is left, I search missing pieces of a puzzle I’m not sure even still exists; Abrasive to disguise my sorrow, hoped for healing, distant…
The Melancholy Spitfire
When I started blogging in 2011, my first blog title was ‘The Melancholy Spitfire’. I didn’t write much on that blog, and took a long break after deleting it. I regret that I did, I had some good entries there, now lost forever. When I mustered up the courage to start another blog, I named…
