Peace

I’m supposed to let go of control over things I cannot force, but I feel responsible for all the same. I seek a higher power for the first time in years, wondering why some are so sure they hear one. I can only imagine one in nature because of the peace that comes from a…

Clouds

Today I laid on my back under a tree, looking up at the sky, its wisps of clouds dancing in the beautiful blue heavens. I breathed in the crisp, cool air and closed my eyes as thoughts flooded my mind. Unexpected tears gently escaped as I thought of lost love, loneliness, my father’s upcoming death…

Crumbs

Breathe in, breathe out you cut some cords that did nothing for you but leave lines blurred You got some attention in vacant ways, minute moments of an endorphin filled daze Then felt the let-down, inevitably empty, no hope for love and consistency, it’s what you’re used to at your core, they give you crumbs…

Mosaic

I’m not broken, just like shattered pieces miraculously come back togetherimproved upon by time and the wisdom of age.I’m not broken because my love was taken for granted,unaccepted, rejected,betrayed.I’m not broken because I took him back as I hoped for change,and it’s not my fault I was his prey,I can’t take that blame.and it’s not…

Seascape

I am diving too much into news, buzzes and feeds, brutally aware of their intended distraction. I feel I am walking through mud as I attempt to make tiny steps toward productivity. When I do take a pause, without this device that threatens to bend my thumbs into a permanent texting state, I feel the…

Tedium

My heartbeat quickens, my head feels light as I attempt to take the steps I’ve been taught are right Get up in the morning, move the body and soul don’t stay in bed  to hear the call of a soft pillow Get my sneakers on head straight to the gym work my body so my…

Questions

I have an abundance to be grateful for while also having to face my demons no matter my progress I still feel the emptiness the nagging anger the venom I speak all in an effort to cloak my vulnerability. I am not always a snake yet I look in the mirror wonder why I say…

Old Songs

I walked into nature alone today and immediately felt the breeze envelop me the sound of the brook babbling trees whistling and whispering to me my phone still had a signal a song came on one I have sung a thousand times before but this time it created a swell of memories I had pushed…

The lies I tell myself

I’m a damaged broken husk of myself robotic in my movements most unremembered except the ones that torture an intrusive stain that grows ever larger as I test my fate I can’t get out of bed I’m a fatal disaster if I move it will prove I can make my life better instead I’ll pull…

Dictate

They are back again dreams swirling through my mind like a bad omen an endless maze of buried memories abstract and nauseating a hangover of doubt I am feeling today agitation and malaise consuming me why can’t I be who I wish to be? why do I spin on this endless wheel? others seem to…